Sorry

Sorry, I'm Canadian and a woman. I say sorry a lot. I've said sorry for bumping into inanimate objects. It's comes far too naturally. But it shouldn't. I've said it in the past that I need to say sorry less often and am constantly encouraging and reminding my daughter that she shouldn't say sorry unless she's done something wrong. A wrote a blog entry about two years ago when she was just learning the word. A new ad from Pantene is encouraging women to stop saying sorry. Ads are infiltrating our lives at every turn, so it's nice when one is actually positive. Yes, they are trying to sell shampoo, but that doesn't make it a bad message.

Women say sorry to start conversations, ask questions, for taking up too much space, for speaking and we need to stop. We don't have to punctuate our ideas or our needs by essentially saying, "I hope you don't mind, but...." I could go on but an article at Time.com about the ad and feminine art of apology is dead on. And here is the ad. Click on the links and watch the ad. It's worth your time.

Twitter Hashtags Making a Difference?

It's been a while since I wrote anything for this blog (I've been busy studying and will be again soon). But that certainly doesn't mean that there haven't been things to write about. Two of the most interesting feminist discussions in the past few months have been happening on Twitter with the hashtags #yesallwomen and #survivorprivilege. A little background on both in case you are unfamiliar:

#yesallwomen started as a response to the May 23rd Santa Barbara shooting and the shooter's misogynist rant before. Women (and men in support) started tweeting their experiences with objectification, safety, harassment, rape and rape culture, security and frankly simply what it means to be a woman today.

#survivorprivilege was a response to a George Will article in the Washington Post. Will, a staunch capital C Conservative, wrote that "when [colleges and universities] make victimhood a coveted status that confers privileges, victim proliferate." Rape survivors responded by sharing their experiences on Twitter.

Critics have responded to these hashtags and the discussions on Twitter (and the corresponding news outlets covering the phenomenon) that talk is cheap and that only action will move us forward. Some men mounted a #notallmen response to the #yesallwomen campaign, trying to negate women's voices or mansplain the situation to us ladies. But I have yet to meet a women who hates all men or thinks that all men are evil. We really are reasonable people who believe that the majority of dudes are good guys.

I am truly awed by the flow of tweets from both men and women and I don't believe that talk is cheap. I think those hashtags, particularly #yesallwomen due to both the volume and variety of tweets, have started a dialogue. Men who had no idea what women think about constantly (i.e., safety, etc.) and go through daily (e.g., fears, cat calling, etc.) now have some idea. My husband doesn't carry his keys like a weapon when he gets off the streetcar after dark, or assess the potential danger behind every corner, or have a cell phone at the ready at all times, or constantly look behind him, or assess the stare of every stranger, or make sure he keeps his head up and meet glances, though not for too long. He just lives. But that is how I, and every other woman, live, every day. Every year. Since we were too young to even really understand what the dangers might be. The dialogue has begun. Women know. Men are now starting to understand. And that's what we need. We need men who now understand to say, "Dude, that's not cool. Stop it." And that's when the dialogue becomes action.

Here are a couple of links to some thought-provoking tweets:
Time.com
Mashable
Feministing
Buzzfeed

Vicks Nyquil Commercial Makes Me Even Sicker

I spent this past weekend in my pyjamas, wrapped in blankets, trying to rid myself of the flu. As one does under such circumstances, I watched copious amounts of television. I saw this commercial for Vicks Dayquil/Nyquil several times; each time it made me angry and by the final time I was vowing to never buy a Vick's product again.

This thing is teeming with sexism. The dad doesn't know how to comb hair, the boy is excited that mom is coming to his game -- but the kicker is the little girl, so excited that mom is going take her to the mall. And once again I have to say this is the subtle bullshit that we have to fight against, the little messages that will invade our daughters' perceptions of the world. Thanks a lot, Vicks.

Goodbye 2013, Hello 2014!

Another year is gone. And yes, some pretty shitty things were said and done by people the world over in 2013, but in the spirit of positivity I want to focus on some of the amazing things that happened in 2013. This list is by no means exhaustive, comprehensive, in any particular order, or, well, anything other than I what I think are great strides forward. So here goes:

• Texas Senator Wendy Davis filibustered the Texas Senate for 13 hours (on her feet and without a bathroom break) so their bill severely limiting the ability for women to get abortions couldn't pass. (Unfortunately, it passed days later. Thank you, Rick Perry.)
• Malala Yousafzai became the first girl and youngest person to be nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, spoke at the UN and published her memoir. Wow.
• Sheryl Sandberg encouraged all women to lean in, regardless of what their goals are. 
• Everyone from Beyonce to Mario Batali is talking about feminism.
• GoldieBlox removed a little more pink from the toy aisle and reminded girls that they can be more than just princesses. 
• Lily Allen and Sinead O'Connor stood up for female musicians. 
• One Billion Rising and V-Day. 
• Jennifer Lawrence, Melissa McCarthy and Alyssa Milano fought back against fat shaming.
• Amy Poehler and Tiny Fey rocked the Golden Globes while Seth McFarlane's boob jokes fell flat at the Oscars.
• The rape laws in India were changed and prominent India women spoke up about the abuses in the country.
• DOMA and Proposition 8 were struck down in the U.S., two laws that greatly discriminated against LGBT couples.
• Elizabeth Warren continued to be her awesome self and got the States working again. 

Here's looking at 2014. Maybe it will be the year we get Wonder Woman on the big screen!