A friend's post about breastfeeding reminded me that I hadn't written about the end of my breastfeeding days. My daughter turned three in March and as we hit her birthday I realized that it was time to end breastfeeding. She no longer needed the milk and I would still provide the same comfort to her and cuddles with her without breastfeeding. Some nights, if she was very tired, she fell asleep without milk, so I knew it was only about comfort and routine now. I worried for a week about how I would stop: should I put vinegar or lemon juice on my nipples and tell her the milk was sick, or say no and endure many nights of crying. In the end I didn't have to do anything. One night, I told her that the milk was going away soon and that she could still cuddle with the milk (she calls my breasts "milk" in addition to calling milk "milk") but soon she wouldn't be able to drink it. She cried for a minute and I held her, and then she was back to her old self. It was not my intent to stop breastfeeding that night, but that's how it worked out. She didn't ask for milk and she fell asleep. And with that we were done. I think I was disappointed that it wasn't a more monumental thing. There was no great sadness, and that's a good thing. We still cuddle the same way we always did. And it's important for me to keep doing with her, even when she thinking she's too old for it. I never did with my parents and it took me a long time to feel comfortable even giving my parents a hug as an adult.
I thought I would quit breastfeeding when I returned to work when she was one, but instead we both adapted to just morning and night feedings. I'm so glad that I didn't listen to others and stop earlier because it's what you're supposed to do (and the Time magazine cover about attachment parent is not how anyone breastfeeds a three year old or any age child -- it's pretty detached, and the mom involved was pretty pissed; see her second cover photo below). This was right was us. Three months or 18 months might be right for others. But we're all different and we have to do what works for us, our children and our families. Everyone needs to just chill out about breastfeeding, bottle feeding and how long you're "supposed" to do it for. Relax, people. It might make me a hippie granola mom, but my favourite saying is true, "It's all good."
Not so much this:
More like this:
